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Sunday, December 22, 2019

I HATE yams

No, I really hate yams. I don't like the mushy texture, they taste (to me) like chicken shit smells, with added sugar. People who do eat them tend to smack, and the color is reminiscent of what I used to remove with the diaper from my baby's butt.
And don't get me started on the scorched marshmallow topping they put on this hated so-called vegetable!


So. Imagine my chagrin, if I happen to be at a liberal table at a Christmas dinner, and some well intentioned idiot actually passes me an otherwise perfectly good casserole dish filled with these filthy things? If I take some, I can practically guarantee that they will go to waste, as there is no way these are invading my sensitive taste buds. And if I don't, and push the dish away, what if it actually offends the otherwise reasonable sensibilities of the person who in some perverse sense actually thinks they are food?


Okay. This may be a bit off kilter. Its not as if I snatched the casserole dish and started flinging spoonsful of ugly orange mush against the festively decorated walls of the family dining room. Nor did I damage a perfectly serviceable receptacle bashing it into a million pieces against the offending liberal's head. (The 'serviceable receptacle' being the dish, not a liberal's head. Just wanted to make sure that was understood....). In this latter case, it would not just be my personal sense of taste, or my own feelings that are in danger, it is a case of destructive mischief at the least, and assault with a deadly vegetable at the worst, and such behavior should be punishable.


But I live in Michigan, was raised by reasonable parents, and have been taught a certain sense of decorum during my upbringing.
I would politely refuse, mumbling something about being allergic to any disgusting foodstuff that looks and smells like baby shit, and those who enjoy this sort of gustatorial infestation would have that much more to themselves. Good on 'em.


But those who enjoy yams don't care if I don't. They don't tie me to the chair and make me watch them eating them with such obvious enjoyment, while they smack their way through mouthful after mouthful. They do not degrade me for my preference for white potatoes, possibly with gravy, white or brown, and accuse me of vegetable bigotry.


Not so the LGBTQ+etc 'community'. And thank goodness I don't live in fucking IOWA! Where a 'repeat offender' is facing 15 years in prison for burning a gay alphabet flag. (Google it, too many hits out there for me to reference one...)
Okay. He shouldn't touch something that doesn't belong to him, and should have learned this in kindergarten. He has no right to tell others how they should feel, or what they should put in their mouths. Yams or otherwise. And he should be punished.
But fifteen years?
Well, says the public defender, its a hate crime.


WHO SAYS? Why do the gays and queers and lesbians get to be offended to the point that burning a piece of rainbow colored cloth deserves prison time, but burning the flag I gave 13 years of my life defending actively, and passively for all of my 55 years is regulated to 'freedom of speech'?
And why is it that real physical communities that have had all types/colors/sexes/ages/income levels since the development of the area are less important than the one fucking household containing a pair of same-sex lovers? How the hell are they more a 'community' than the entire block of diverse persons and personalities?


I'm not against gays. Any more than I'm against people getting old, or being young when they're born. I don't care how much money you have or how much you don't. The color or your skin will always mean less to me then your caliber as a person. And I don't care if you like guys, girls, or (consenting, age-appropriate) goats. I don't personally want to see you sucking face in public. Or any other body parts. I find it annoying. And therefore, I look somewhere else and let others deal with you making a spectacle of yourself. Wear plaid with stripes if that's your thing. I can and will keep wearing bluejeans and flannel shirts. You be you. Or as that great American, Popey the Sailorman, was wont to say: I yam what I yam and that's all what I yam! (apparently, he had no taste in vegetables either... he actually thought spinach was a food group. But YAMS!?) He never denigrated Wimpy for his oral addiction to hamburgers, or cared what Bluto did in his bedroom behind closed doors. Nor did he ever try to body shame Olive Oyl for her anorexic proclivities. Just went about his own business. Hell, I don't like tattoos, but you'll never hear me putting him down for his tasteful and non-discriminatory anchor tat.... He yam what he yam, after all.


And I don't think the fucking government has any right to prosecute 'hate crime' any more than it has to prosecute 'thought crime'. Thoughts, feelings, morality, NONE of them are any of the governments business. Nor mine. Nor yours for that matter.


How a person feels is no one's business but their own. Their actions, should they prove intrusive or abusive or downright criminal are. And should be addressed appropriately. But adding terms like 'hate' or 'intent' or 'potential' to crime is wrong, and only hurts the majority. You know; those of us who, through no actual fault or intent, hate.


Like yams for example.....

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