Monday, December 31, 2018


Right front pocket:
Had to use an internet picture of this multitool from Swisstech... My buddy has mine after using it, and I'm gonna have to fight him to get it back...

I like the loop thingee on this, and has a Phillips and flat driver. Bottle opener has come in handy a time or two...

3.5" with partial serrated for pesky rope and shit
Left front pocket:
Minimalist blade for light work

Gotta keep myself kissable...

On a belt loop:
 Petroleum infused cottonball in
Metal container. Whistle

Folding scissors

Large size clippers

Kind of a p38, but has its own small spoon built in...

Precision tweezers
Small metal pill capsule I carry salt in

Dog tag sized fishhook/frogging gig

Precision screwdriver set with bit storage

Cotton balls light real quick with this ferro magnesium rod

Full sized screwdriver. I carry the bits in a small container in my left front pocket.
This also has a 3/8 socket head built in...
In my wallet:
Knife edge, can opener, sockets, ruler...

Outdoor survival card in stainless steel

Cheap ass sharp as hell credit card knife

Bottle opener/can opener/spork thingee
Defunct plastic card with needles, thread, fishing line
On my belt:
Large fixed blade with diamond
sharpener in sheath.
Not shown (because it's in my glove box as I don't need it often): Snare wire and pre-made snares.

Well, that's it for what I carry every day, every where. Doc never fails to laugh when I empty my belt and pockets at weigh in.... Forgot one time, so she re-weighed me after I took it all off: about 8 lbs....

Update: thanks Odysseus!
Also on my belt:

A thought on an earlier post (July 19th, 2015)

I was looking at some earlier posts I've done, and came up on one called "Hoard for the Hordes". I wrote this one after a visit from my Utah-settled sister to my brother's house in Oklahoma, where I had to explain why I carry so many weird and unusual objects with me to my brother in law.
He then extolled at length over the bounty of food they had set in storage in the Mormon (don't get me started on THEM) tradition of End Of The World Preparedness.
I actually agree with having food set aside for emergencies. And water. And a means to create warmth and cook. And a self sufficient lifestyle, etc. etc. ad nauseum.
And in reading this long ago written post, where my brother in law extolled his virtuous Mormon discipline of storing SO much food for the End Of The World, something came to me that I wish I had mentioned to him at the time.

I, too, was visiting our sibling at his house, about 30 miles away from my own home. I had all the accouterments of self-sufficiency on my person that I always carry. Even without which, I could probably make it home.

Unfortunately, they had forgotten to pack their years worth of food, now 1,187 miles away, along with them in case the End Of The World came while they were out...

I may carry a lot of tools and shit I'll never need at all times, but I've always held firm to the old adage of "better to have it and not need it, than have it at home and be 1,187 miles away from it".

Blatantly self-centered promotional request

I recently added a widget thingee to my home page for all three of my regular readers of my irregular posts to sign up as followers... It's up there in the top left hand corner there... See it? Good.

Even though I don't post regularly, or enough for that matter, I still get some hits daily, and am only a measly 10,000 hits away from my first half million views. So, I figured I'd see how many people actually wait with unashamedly bated breath for the next installment of my Neanderthalic blatherings. So far, since this widget thingee has been up, I've gotten only ONE follower! (Okay, I snuck into my wife's phone and signed her up....)
Hence, this unrepentant, blatant, self-centered plea for followers to stoke my ego.
There. I said it.
I now return you to your regularly scheduled life without further interruption.

Thursday, December 27, 2018

A typical day in the life of a Vulgar Curmudgeon

Law of Mechanical Repair: After your hands become coated with grease your nose will begin to itch or you'll have to pee.

Law of the Workshop: Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.

Law of probability: The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act.

Law of the Telephone: When you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal.

Law of the Alibi: If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the very next morning you will have a flat tire.

Variation Law: If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will start to move faster than the one you are in now. (works every time)

Bath Theorem: When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone will ring.

Law of Close Encounters: The probability of meeting someone you know increases when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.

Law of the Result: When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will.

Law of Biomechanics: The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.

Theatre Rule: At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle arrive last.

Law of Coffee: As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.

Murphy's Law of Lockers: If there are only two people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.

Law of Dirty Rugs/Carpets: The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich of landing face down on a floor covering are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet/rug.

Law of Location: No matter where you go, there you are.

Law of Logical Argument: Anything is possible if you don't know what you are talking about.

Brown's Law: If the shoe fits, it's ugly.

Oliver's Law: A closed mouth gathers no feet.

Wilson 's Law: As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it.

Have some FUN once in a while

Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways - beer in one hand - chocolate in the other - body thoroughly
used up, totally worn out and screaming, "WOO HOO, What a Ride!"


There truly is no better way to appreciate the soul of man than to view a beautiful sunset:

Sunday, December 23, 2018

Gonna be busy

Next couple of days are busy for all of I suppose, and I'll be spending them mostly at my wrecked nephew's place. It's my brother's oldest kid, just had  surgery, and heats his home with wood. It's an old insane asylum here in Hart, MI: 36 rooms, lots of space, comes with its own graveyard out front where the old nutters were buried back in the day. Real cozy.
Gonna help him put some wood in the basement to help him get through the holidays. Heck of a time of year to be stove up.

Anyway, I don't post enough as it is, but wanted to wish all of those out there reading this, and those who have helped Rose and myself through some rough patches a Merry Christmas. You're all important to me and I am blessed to have you in my life in every way.
May you all be happy, healthy, and loved.
With great affectation,

Ps. Thanks Paul. Merry Christmas!

Me thinks we doth accept too much

Way back when, I posted a blurb about Bill Cosby's remarks on black folks. (Link)
I never really believed, or even hoped for that matter, that things would change. Educated people (of ANY background) by the very fact of having a modicum of intelligence know that if someone is offering them something for  nothing, it's usually the other way around.
Naive people believe all people are good and noble. They assume that the golden rule holds sway over humanity. And that the government as it is today STILL has their best interests at heart.
Unfortunately, at least for the fate of our nation, educated people aren't even a noticeable portion of our populace anymore.
With all of the knowledge of history at our fingertips and in a time of instant access to all the information accrued by mankind over the centuries, we spend our time solely in pursuit of mind numbing entertainment.

Their ARE educated people out there. Most of them using their advantage over the masses to create a relationship of shepherds to a flock, feeding and fattening the animals which are quite content with their diet of American Idol, reality TV, and the latest super star sports figure, while drinking the government Kool-ade, in order to sacrifice whichever of the flock gets uppity and feast on the remains, secure in the fact that the rest of the flock will quietly accept the status quo.

I would like to take the opportunity to pause in this tirade to pose a question:


As an example to this, I submit to you an article I received over a 'news' feed I subscribe to covering the 'fat-shaming' of a fucking otter. AND, as if that isn't enough to make this article acceptable to the dumb-downed masses, they did the aforementioned shaming using 'AAVE'! No, really!

Now I know some of you may be scratching your heads over this acronym. What indeed is AAVE, and what could it have to do with hurting the feelings of an over weight river mammal?

Let me explain. It is no longer enough to find that something in and of itself is offensive. It is now de reguere to also include HOW this offensiveness is delivered.
Apparently, this disgusting disregard for a weight challenged semi aquatic mammal was delivered using Afro American Vernacular English!
(Full article)
So now you aren't just insulting an otter, you're also insulting an entire RACE who have somehow managed to create a new vernacular, acceptable only for their use, while doing so!

 Apparently, a manner of talking like a moron with an IQ of a standard issue North American ROCK which would have embarrassed my family had I deigned to use this ghetto slang is now a 'vernacular'!

That's fucking whack, bro'.