Women, Let's start a conversation....

First off, I am NOT against women. I don't feel they should be relegated to the state of second class citizen. If a woman wants to be a diesel mechanic, and has the ability, Go For It.
I do NOT hate women. Actually, my Mom was one, and both of my sisters. I've had two wives. The first wasn't worth much, but the second gets up and makes my coffee in the morning, so its ready when I pull my sorry ass out of bed.

And if my wife wants ANYTHING, and it is within my power to get it for her, its hers.
ANYTHING!

But equality? FUCK THAT. Why the HELL would a true woman want to be a man's equal, when she has the potential to be his pet? Oh, crap, I can hear it now: HIS PET! WHAT THE HELL???!!!

Well, let me elucidate, if you will. I have a dog. My dog loves me. When I come home, he runs up with his whole body wagging just BECAUSE I'm home. Everything is somehow right in his world just due to my mere mortal presence.

I receive a great deal of joy and satisfaction from this exchange. And if my dog shits in the yard and not in my house, he gets a doggy treat. If he leaves me alone when I'm tired, I'm much more anxious to give all the more petting later, when I've come to my senses. And if he just lays beside me because I don't feel like giving him the attention his devotion deserves, I feel comforted, and find my hand straying to the back of his neck to give him an affectionate rub. Its the way we interact, and it works.

I don't beat my dog. He used to get swatted when he crapped in the house. He learned not to in order to avoid this heinous treatment. And he gets his "cookie". I am not his master, I am his keeper. I do what I have to in order to ensure he is a well behaved dog, and he is my pet. PERIOD. And no, I'm not saying a woman should be swatted, unless they ask nicely. I'm saying that if your mate is doing something that annoys you, you let them know, and work out a solution. With a dog, its a swat or a treat. With a woman its that they get "ignored" by a sulky man, or get whatever the hell it is women want. Major difference is a woman can understand when you talk to them, a dog can't. She may not LISTEN, but she can understand.

Now we'll move on to my wife. She is NOT my equal. She is so far above me that I have to grab a stepladder to kiss her feet. Which, if she asks me too, I will rub. NO, I don't volunteer, I'm a man.
She goes to work. I feel bad about this, as I am physically disabled, and not yet "acknowledged" by the government. (Court is Oct. 10th.) And I sleep in. BUT: I make sure she has a nice lunch, and try to make dinner for when she comes home. Sometimes I have a hard time with one arm, but its usually edible. Sorta.

She gets upset if I make my own cup of coffee and not ask her, because she knows I'm always in pain. But I make it anyway, cause she takes care of me in so many other ways.

AND, I like the way her eyes light up when she sees me come in the room. So I give her a "cookie": I tell her I love her.

If I could, I would be working every day to give her the 'necessities' and every perk a woman could want. I worked for the first nineteen years of our marriage, and now, she's taking up the slack for my inability.

See? she CAN do what I have done for years. She's as tough as nails and as delicate as a rose petal. Does she want to work? FUCK NO. She'd MUCH rather stay home, bake cakes and pies, make dinner, take care of the house, and take care of ME. Because she KNOWS she's better than me.

And so do I.

And, I know that she is a woman. First, last, and everything in between. Loving, caring, and will kill you without remorse or regret if you mess with those she loves.

Why the fuck would she want to settle for being my equal? Why would she want to have me emasculated and denigrated to the point where she has to be my keeper, and not my pet?

Just askin'

(This rant brought to you by my reading THIS post over at I'm41.com.  H/T and blame him!)